Monday, March 7, 2011

The Best Husband's Wife Writes


As I am tinkering the keyboard for this post, my husband is somewhere in the United States sleeping to recover from the jetlag feeling. In his email earlier, he said it felt freezing out there. Man, I wish I can give him a hug, just like minutes before that tough moment yesterday.

Yes, I took him to the airport. That was one of the most difficult times in my life. Seeing him walking away with all his luggage tore me apart inside but I had to keep myself together because I know he was trying to hold his emotions too. Nobody wanted that. And so we hugged and said our “I love you” to each other. This decision is for “us” and it’s for the best.

Central Park in Corvallis, Oregon
Don’t get me wrong! We didn’t have a break-up or anything of that sort. We’re hoping that it won’t be long before we can be together again. He had to fly because he has to be in his country as requisite for my green card application. We didn’t plan really about moving or settling there. But some events in our marriage life prompted us to pick better choices and that is to pursue the best of life. Sadly, we cannot see that happening here in the Philippines.

There’s no life in Manila. Every freaking day, you are treated to a lungful of polluted air, to deafening vehicle horns and to unbelievable attitudes of some people. You can’t leave your door unlocked. You can’t even trust your neighbour. You can’t trust the food that restaurants serve. Either they’re loaded with MSG or they’re loaded with factory crap labeled as “ingredients.” While that holds true anywhere in the world, the reality remains clear. It’s not that there’s nothing here in Manila for us, but there’s so much more if we try outside.

Some people, especially Filipinos, won’t agree with that. But my husband John and I believe that there is a reason why half of the world wants to be in the United States. And to be honest, this wasn’t my idea—but his. And the reality is, my man is oozing with all things wisdom and common sense—a rarity among men. He’s the smartest man, I must say. And he’s got the biggest heart too, with soul so pure and selfless. With that, I say, I trust him in this decision.

You see, when we realized the beauty of sharing a real relationship, all that mattered to us is to be “for keeps” and to keep things “for real.” Whatever the world says is none of our business. Quoting Oscar Wilde, “We have the simplest taste. We only settle for the best.”

So, when we’ve come to our senses and accepted the real score, we had to make plans because we’re running out of time.

Ours is an unusual tale that people inadvertently judge from the surface. You must know that my husband and I have this huge age difference. In fact, he’s older than my dad. But who cares? When we’re together, we don’t feel any of that. We pay no mind to age because for me, that’s just a figure, a man-made symbol. He is my best friend, my confidant, my one true love. And I can honestly say that.

For his part, I can’t find the right words to say. Whenever someone asks me why I ended up with him, I simply say “coz John’s the Best Husband awardee.” More than being a thinking cap and a humor tank rolled into one, his amazing character is a rare find. And this once in a lifetime chance of ending up with the best man in the world is something that I can’t pass up. What can I offer? My pair of metal accessories?

Yes, I am using crutches. Throw into the basket that I am a Filipino and he's an American and that will make this love story a strange mix. But like I said, he made me feel as though he didn’t see my "extra legs" or he didn't take face or physical value against me. He loves me for what I am and together, we built a beautiful friendship that rolled over to the biggest event in my life—marrying him.

That is why, this separation that I pray will be brief, say a couple of months (Calling the Immigration Office ... haha!) seems to be a difficult time for me. Because John spoiled me with his love, presence, and a real marriage. As he would put it, “Have you ever seen an American house bitch?” Hahaha!

Now tell me, what can I ask for? #